Memories from Earth: Remembering My Name

This is a fun story that I have not really told many people. In fact, I think I’ve only told one person outside of my immediate circle about it, because it was relevant to a discussion we were having at the time. So, I shall tell you the story of how I remembered my name.

First, let me make something clear for those reading in case you did not know:

I am not someone who has had an immersion pod experience. I incarnated directly on Earth in an Earth body of my own specification and was born on Earth like every other Earth human is born. Though I allowed my soul-son Ap’phi to drive my body while I was a child, and walked in to that body later in childhood. There were considerable adjustments made to the Earth body to allow for better connection to myself, much of which occurred in a semi-conscious way.

Now that that is out of the way. Let me tell you the story of how I remembered my name. It is not quite so romantic as Chihiro and Kohaku remembering their names as they fall through the sky to beautiful orchestral music. But it will have to do! Because it’s what happened!

When I was a teenager, around 16 years old or so, my brother and I were big into playing an online game called Ragnarok Online. It was one of the early MMORPGs on Earth that had become popular in the early 2000’s. (MMORPG: Massively Multiplayer Online Roleplaying Game - can we add any more words to make it sound more enticing to me?) We had a group of friends we played with—the self-same friends with whom we later wrote fictional space adventure stories—and were generally enjoying ourselves.

In this game, I usually played a Knight, because who doesn’t like riding a giant bird creature and smacking things with a sword? My brother played a Priest, because who doesn’t like shining light on things and banishing the dead? We were fighting our way through one of the dungeons together with one of our friends, and one of the spells my brother casts on me to protect me is called “Kyrie Eleison”. I like the sound of this spell a lot. I like that it makes a church bell sound when it’s cast. I like the name even more. I log this in my mind somewhere and don’t think too much more about it.

Side note: I am not a religious person at this time. I also did not grow up Catholic on Earth this lifetime, so the name of this spell and its relation to the Catholic Church is not a conscious one. I did have a past life as a monk in England at one point, though. “Kyrie Eleison” is Greek for “Lord, have mercy.”

A year later, I’ve gotten tired of Ragnarok Online and start playing a sci-fi MMORPG called Anarchy Online. I like this game. It’s strange, set on an odd planet, has a mix of technology, magic, and just weird alien creatures everywhere. (Two-headed wolves, floating octopi, deerish type creatures that are green and glow…) I love it. All over it.

When it’s time to make a character, I decide to go with an “Adventurer” class, which is someone who can shapeshift into animals using nano-technology. They also wield this high-tech sword. Okay, yes, let’s go. That sounds like me all over. I go to make the name, and I immediately want to call this character “Kyrie”. But ah, alas, it’s taken.

I try to generate a number of other names, but I keep coming back to “Kyrie”. I was a big reader of Lord of the Rings, and I thought, “Okay, let’s make it sound more feminine and elvish.” “Kyrielle”. Not taken. Looks good. Sounds even better than Kyrie. Off we go.

(I also have no idea that a kyrielle is a type of French poetry, even though at that age I am taking French and writing poetry. My soul is hilarious.)

This character name then proceeds to infect the rest of my brain with its influence. Before I realize it, I want all my usernames to be “Kyrielle”. I want my online presence to be “Kyrielle”. My friends in the game, even though I rapidly changed to a different class with a different name are already calling me Kyrielle.

There comes a moment around the age of 17, going on 18, that I realize if someone were to call the name “Kyrielle” verbally, I would actually turn around and look for who was saying my name. I find this to be very, very, very interesting at the time. How can a character name be so infectious for me?

I keep using this name over and over throughout my life online. I can’t really use it in the physical world, primarily because the people in my physical life don’t understand this sort of phenomenon. They just don’t. They thought my gaming habits were somewhat childish at times. Real adults don’t play video games, is the subtext to many comments about my habits. Also, changing your name legally is a bit of a complicated process. I decided I was comfortable enough with my Earth name to let it stand.

It wasn’t until a couple of years ago I figured out why that name was so infectious.

"Kyrielle" is the name of my higher self. It is a name I have used with incarnated selves in the past, yes, but I use it now not in the aim of becoming who I was then but in enfolding that into who I am now. Further, as I continued to embody my higher self, it became more and more my own name. Until mentally it completely eclipsed my Earth name. Mentally, I rarely call myself by my given Earth name anymore (I still do sometimes). I call myself “Kyrie” most of the time. I didn’t adapt the spelling of it until a year ago, and the spelling is really just phonetic Taygetan. “Kyriel” is “Kyrielle” with simpler phonetics.

And that’s how I remembered my own name. Funny how you just get guided along to things without you even noticing it at the time. When you look back, you look in amazement at the labyrinth you navigated.

So hallo to you, I am Kyriel.

You can call me Kyrie for short. As if chopping off one letter makes it that much shorter.

I thank you for your time. Adiamas.

—Kyriel